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Tuesday, December 2, 2008

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Today’s Feature: “Bright Inaugural Day, Washington” by Lauren Frey
Latest in Digest: Lincoln Logorrhea

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Jessica Francis Kane

Jessica Francis Kane
TMN Contributing Writer Jessica Francis Kane’s first collection of stories, Bending Heaven, was published in the U.S. and the U.K. Her work has appeared in a number of publications, including McSweeney’s and Virginia Quarterly Review, and has been serialized on BBC radio. She lives in New York.

Pilgrimage

Many people hope to be authors, even some in the publishing business. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE goes back to a monastery to see both sides of the story. (Personal Essays | November 21, 2008)

Girl Lessons

Mothers and daughters don’t always have the easiest relationships, especially when the daughters try to recycle the mothers with the trash. A story of aspirations, generations, and pop-culture quizzes by JESSICA FRANCIS KANE. (Personal Essays | May 9, 2008)

Things We’re Denying Ourselves

A recession looms at the door—before it arrives, we have an opportunity to improve our minds, bodies, and wallets. Though we may soon be denying ourselves more than pleasures, this is what we’re omitting right now. (Of Recent Note | April 30, 2008)

Easy-Fake Oven

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. In this week’s installment, JESSICA FRANCIS KANE breaks down all that pre-heating nonsense, with a heating guide for 21st-century cookery. (The Non-Expert | April 25, 2008)

The Party Racket

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week, JESSICA FRANCIS KANE solves another parenting mystery: Exactly how many of your child’s classmates must you invite to the birthday party? (The Non-Expert | February 2, 2008)

Hangover Cures

Robert Benchley once quipped, “The only cure for a real hangover is death.” Though ultimately true, right now there are holiday parties to attend. THE WRITERS offer solutions for the morning after. (Of Recent Note | December 13, 2007)

The Rules

The laws of the playground aren’t just for children. New York City parents have to keep an eye out for garbage, syringes, and disturbed men bearing toys. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE gets a lesson in the linguistics of proper city parenting. (New York, New York | December 4, 2007)

The Backseat Killer

A maniac is chasing an innocent woman. She gets home and runs to her house, just as the pursuing car screeches in to the driveway. How will it end? Only THE WRITERS know, in our annual open-ended gore fest. (Spoofs & Satire | October 31, 2007)

Secret Gardens

Now a New Yorker, our resident green essayist JESSICA FRANCIS KANE brings her yardwork series to the big city, even if it means breaking into private plots. (Notes From the Lawn | October 11, 2007)

Fall Fashion

You’ve heard from Marc Jacobs, Proenza Schouler, and Chloe Sevigny on what to wear this season. Now it’s our turn. The monthly round-up from THE WRITERS on what appeals, this time from their closets. (Of Recent Note | September 18, 2007)

Leaving Charlottesville

Departing the (garden) lovers’ state for one that loves its cement and money more, our scribbler of the lillies JESSICA FRANCIS KANE realizes the crucial difference between caring about plants and caring for them. (Notes From the Lawn | August 14, 2007)

Adverb Your Enthusiasm

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week, JESSICA FRANCIS KANE helps a reader determine if her one true love is letting adverbs get in the way of romance. (The Non-Expert | August 3, 2007)

Midnight in the Garden of Wood and Evil

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week, JESSICA FRANCIS KANE addresses a reader’s concern about her plant’s feelings with stories about menacing shrubs. (The Non-Expert | July 6, 2007)

Room to Read: A Modest Proposal

What better way to relax after a kid-filled day than with a nice book—and what less likely scenario can many parents imagine? For page-turners everywhere, JESSICA FRANCIS KANE has a novel idea. (Op-Ed | May 30, 2007)

Delphiniums, Delphiniums, Delphiniums!

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week, JESSICA FRANCIS KANE celebrates National Gardening Month with some horticultural advice garnered from a Tri-Delt newsletter. (The Non-Expert | April 20, 2007)

Catalog of Dreams

Our resident poet of the orange blossoms, JESSICA FRANCIS KANE discovers the literary charms of gardening catalogs: reading for aesthetic pleasure, also for planning the future. (Notes From the Lawn | April 11, 2007)

Tomato Mori

The botanical arts can be passed down, whispered along, or demonstrated with a spade. But who the teacher turns out to be can be a greater surprise than his secrets for growing tomatoes. Our resident gardener JESSICA FRANCIS KANE gets ready for the Fourth of July. (Notes From the Lawn | March 12, 2007)

The Mommy Wars

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week JESSICA FRANCIS KANE helps a frustrated mother cope: how to deal with—nevermind survive—those overly nice mothers at play dates. (The Non-Expert | February 8, 2007)

What’s Your Resolution?

The confetti’s been tossed, the funny hats are crumpled in the corner, and at least three of us had a little too much champagne. At the start of a new year, THE WRITERS offer an answer to the question everybody’s asking. (Spoofs & Satire | January 2, 2007)

Potluck Supper

The best Thanksgivings are the ones where all the guests bring their own specialties to the table. Eight CONTRIBUTING WRITERS serve up their best, potluck-style. With illustrations by ANNA FEATHERLY. (Personal Essays | November 22, 2006)

Plain Air Dining

Americans love their cars—as chariots, mobile offices, and teenage make-out spots. But when did they become dining tables? JESSICA FRANCIS KANE reports on a disturbing trend in the heartland. (Notes From the Lawn | November 17, 2006)

Plantmanship

What sort of gardener looks forward to winter’s first frost? Our in-house green thumb JESSICA FRANCIS KANE doubts herself after seeing what an expert Virginia gardener—and her garden—looks like. (Notes From the Lawn | November 3, 2006)

American Samaritan

In the past five years the U.S. has had no closer partner than the U.K., and though it’s not always a perfect marriage, Yanks and Brits can still come together to solve a problem—even on the steps of the British Library. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE writes. (Personal Essays | September 12, 2006)

Daddies Unbound

The stereotype that dads don’t show much skill or interest in child-rearing should have gone out when you were still in diapers—so why does it persist? JESSICA FRANCIS KANE says it’s not dads who are trying to duck duty, but moms who won’t share. (Op-Ed | July 13, 2006)

The Heirloom Ficus

When a loved one’s houseplants are divided up, what you get isn’t a condition of your standing as a relative, but of your ability as a gardener. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE has a story of memory and maintenance, and the discovery of a special bond. (Notes From the Lawn | June 21, 2006)

A Word of Advice

‘Tis the season of graduation ceremonies, when many will be told it’s the first day of the rest of their lives. THE WRITERS disagree, and offer the ultimate commencement speech. (Spoofs & Satire | May 4, 2006)

BetweenTheLines.com

Tired of having your work rejected by editors left and right? The Frustrated Amateur Writers Network may be just what you need to jump-start your writing career. They won’t be able to get you published—but they can help you feel better about it. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE writes. (Spoofs & Satire | April 20, 2006)

Forced: A Flower Show

Gardeners love to commune with nature. Though not as much as they love to commune with ice cream and plasma screens and loud noises and personality quizzes. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE report from the middle of 33 indoor acres of plants. (Notes From the Lawn | April 3, 2006)

Brushes With the Law

Who knew what evil once lurked in the hearts of THE WRITERS? Arsonists, accomplices, troublemakers all, here are nine lives of crime, cut short. (Personal Essays | March 22, 2006)

Landscaped Beyond all Recognition

We bemoan the rise of the McMansion, the slash-and-burn path of the strip mall—but the real problem may be lurking in the shrubbery. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE looks at where our yards are now. (Notes From the Lawn | February 21, 2006)

Auld Lang Syne

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything—though some problems are so big, so perennial, that even the Non-Expert can’t tackle them alone. Edited by Intern BETH MILTON, six writers offer ways to avoid being kissless on New Year’s Eve. (The Non-Expert | December 23, 2005)

Raising the Stakes

Drooping flowers are no gardener’s friend. So how can you fix them? And, more to the point, how did these things ever get by without us? A few simple ways to make the world bend to our will. (Notes From the Lawn | October 6, 2005)

Magic Step

One person’s porch is another’s stomping ground; one person’s garden is another’s view. This week: How to share the world with your neighbors or, failing that, how to suffer their existence. (Notes From the Lawn | September 22, 2005)

Our Faded Summers

It may be something in the sunscreen, but funny things happen during summer—dehydration, Lyme disease, brief romantic flings. Collected writings of love lost and won (but mostly lost), presented by TMN Summer Intern HEATHER RASLEY. (Personal Essays | August 17, 2005)

Container Gardening

Even in urban decay, nature can find a way to thrive. This week: Making the case for making friends with your neighbors, both human and insect. (Notes From the Lawn | August 15, 2005)

The Weed Hound

We want gardening to seem so natural, something any of us, given a trowel, can do. But the autodidacts among us should realize that sometimes help is needed. This week: How a mail-order gardening tool saved a marriage. (Notes From the Lawn | August 1, 2005)

Insects and Expats

No matter how many ferns we arrange or seedlings we covet, many of us have a very complicated relationship with the landscape. This week: A London bumblebee needs no help, thank you. (Notes From the Lawn | July 19, 2005)

The Homeland Security Annuals Budget

What looks better with sandbags—marigolds or bluebonnets? A privied look at how the decisions are made on what to plant and where, and ways to beautify a bollard. (Spoofs & Satire | July 7, 2005)

Tempting but Ill-Advised Email Auto-Responses

Email can be a time-saving, productive tool; that is, except when your friends and family are the ones behind it. Jessica Francis Kane finds new ways to let technology filter out the noise of life. (Opinions | May 17, 2005)

Home: An NPR Radio Expedition

Visits home can wear down even the best of us, but when heard in excruciating detail can become absolutely…excruciating. Jessica Francis Kane presents an audio adventure at her parents’ house. (Stories | May 6, 2005)


TODAY’S FEATURE

Bright Inaugural Day, Washington

The U.S. presidential inauguration in January will be one for the ages. LAUREN FREY concludes her series of election-related verse with a hat tip to Langston Hughes.

My Incredulous Face

Holiday Travel Hell

Nicole Pasulka compiles tales of horror from the TMN writers.

NOW IN STORE

The Morning News Annual 2008

Introducing our year-end print edition. Favorites from the past year, plus new pieces by some of your favorite TMN writers.

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DIGEST

Lincoln Logorrhea

In his cabinet choices, as in his home state, our president-elect mirrors our 16th president. Gore Vidal’s historical novel about Lincoln helps to balance the dozens of more rigid bios.