humor
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Spoofs & Satire
From the Files of the Dream Police
They’re waiting for you. They’re looking for you. Every single night they’re on duty, ready to drive you insane. Stories from the blotter of the men inside your brain.
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Spoofs & Satire
Our Future National Pastime
Predictions for the baseball season ahead from someone who hasn’t paid attention to sports statistics since the 1992 Orioles.
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Tournamenting
Rebellion Rules in a Conformist World
Last year, our correspondent entered a March Madness pool with brackets filled out by his mother, who knows nothing about NCAA men’s basketball. He won. Now it’s time for lightning to strike twice.
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Spoofs & Satire
Life After Long-Term Unemployment
You wanted it. You were willing to give up BBC dramas for it. Now it’s time to readjust to the working life. Welcome back.
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Spoofs & Satire
This Will Be the Year That Was
As 2012 hatches, many face the new year with trepidation and excitement. Whose political fortunes will shine brightest? Were the Mayans right? Here are startlingly accurate predictions for the year ahead.
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Election 2012
Yoga for Presidential Candidates
Running for president is stressful and allows little time for exercise. But a special set of yoga positions, from the Downward-Facing Spiral to a Soaring Newt, can offer just the break from routine that a candidate needs.
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Kids Today
Things That Go Fifff Striiik Bam! in the Night
The day you become a parent, your sonic world expands to include hundreds of new sounds to amaze, annoy, and terrify. A field report of 14 alarms and ambient textures.
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#OccupyWallStreet
The Luxe Love Life of Veronica van der Vöorhies
When hard times hit a notable—and note-taking—member of Manhattan’s 1%, she seeks out comfort in warm arms, big and strong, at New York’s Zuccotti Park.
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Halloween Endings
The Monkey’s Paw
A foreign talisman holds great power, but those who use it do so at their peril. In the grand TMN tradition of celebrating Halloween, our editors and writers create new endings to a well-known scary story.
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Men & Women / Men & Men / Women & Women
The Things She Carried
Once a relationship is past the point of repair, once her Go Bag is packed for leaving, some things are better set down on paper than spoken aloud.
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Spoofs & Satire
Remembering Anwar Al-Awlaki, a Mellow Cat
When al Qaeda cleric Anwar al-Awlaki was killed in a drone attack late last month, friends and colleagues were left to mourn a man of generosity, humility, and an amazing porno collection.
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Local News
On the Beat
In a North Carolina mountain town, the cops are good old boys, the sheriff’s a teddy bear, and the chief conducts drug raids in his head. All of which spells nothing good for a Mexican caught with a carful of guns, or for the town’s “Cop Beat” reporter.