The Morning News

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Currently: "The MTA brought me to Shutter Island Monday through Friday, and every day I feared for my life." Our summer jobs. http://tmne.ws/15339
about 9 hours ago

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March 16, 2004

Limericks with Texas City Names in Them

There was a girl who moved to Corpus Christi
Who told everyone, ‘Call me Misty’
Which wasn’t her name
But it was all just the same
Since last week she was a man in Poughkeepsie


* * *


There once was an architect in Dallas
Who built his fiancée a whole palace
But in their wedding consummation
He cracked the foundation
And then she learned where lay his true talents


* * *


A ribald young lass, way of Houston
Promised the barkeep a good boostin’
If he’d give her a shot
Of wine, whiskey, and schnapps
Thus began her career in prostitoostin’


* * *


There was a young couple in Austin
Who named their new baby boy ‘Austin’
They thought it unique
’Til at the school roll they peeked
And they saw: ‘Austin,’ ‘Austin,’ ‘Austin,’ ‘Austin,’ ‘Austin’


TODAY’S FEATURE

Part-Time Knowledge

The worst summer employment is a three-month slog. But sometimes even temporary jobs offer permanent lessons. Our STAFF AND READERS share what they’ve learned.

OUR MAN IN BOSTON

Jeff Bezos Sucks

Connecting Shirley Sherrod and Alfred Dreyfus, biographies of buildings and Charles McCarry, and Faulkner and my TMN homies.

TMN MERCH

If a Bird Can’t Fly It Walks

Our bumper sticker, perfect for your hopeless cube or above your workbench at home, where the real work is done.
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TMN TALKS

Lauren Mechling & Laura Moser

Young adult novelists Lauren Mechling and Laura Moser are currently publishing their new novel—a meta-vampire story called My Darklyng about the writer and fans...