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Headlines for Wednesday, May 31, 2006

New York’s currently: all up in your trees

Bush names Goldman Sachs chair (and treehugger) Henry Paulson as Treasury secretary; Paulson doesn’t mind the $37 million pay cut.

On average, nearly 80 Iraqis were killed or wounded every day from mid-February through mid-May, up from the previous quarter’s 60 per day.

War in Darfur now finding its victims through disease, dehydration; peace in the region looks unlikely as treaty with remaining rebel groups remains unsigned.

Op: Darfur was never the simplistic morality tale purveyed by the news media and humanitarian organizations.

Former P.O.W. receives note from the Iraqi colonel who interrogated him 15 years ago.

When children’s BMIs appear on their report cards, the war on childhood obesity may gone too far.

Acoustics expert discerns the Mona Lisa’s voice. (Listen here.)

Remains found at Roman Forum that date to 300 years before the founding of Rome; nice pillows discovered in Egyptian coffin.

For those who don’t mind going tribal, help convert a remote South Pacific island into an eco-community.

Dutch pedophiles launch political party, want to lower age of consent and legalize child porn, bestiality.

Andrew Womack on the week in mp3s.

Forget PacManhattan, NYU students are into life-sized Super Mario Bros.see video here.

PC vs. Mac debate as experienced in New York newsroom.

TMN summer intern Jen wants you to know that unpaid internships are sending the economy into the toilet.

The best cover songs, as selected by the music blogosphere.

Batwoman not killed by League of Assassins, now batting for the other team.

Video: The Hullabaloo Dancers dance to Batman; The Real World: Metropolis.

Seeing web sites as graphs, and you can make your own here.

About those unreadable characters you have to type to get access to web sites: Nobody can read them.

The pros and cons of birds.

Headlines for Tuesday, May 30, 2006

New York’s currently: suddenly summer

Anti-U.S. rioting blows up in Kabul with at least 14 dead; death urged on dog washers.

Afghanistan: the sleeper crisis of the summer, and the new battleground between India and Pakistan.

Indonesian survivors desperate for aid; Guantanamo hunger strikers now number 75.

New York optimistically imagined for 2016: the “it” ‘hood around the High Line; multiple trams ferrying commuters.

The New York seen during Fleet Week is nothing like the city of yesteryears, and the sailors aren’t so predictable either.

The New Yorker caps its Meg & Jason reporting.

Unearthed email reveals what life was like in 1995.

Two expert skydivers collide, one dies; first-time skydiver slips from her harness, dies.

Soccer used by Europeans to further ostracize Iran.

Former top Navy lawyer says either we care about detainee abuse or risk corrupting our heritage.

National Spelling Bee competition begins this Wednesday; where did the term “spelling bee” come from?

Inside Brooklyn’s indie publishing scene.

Attention book buyers: “Bestseller” and “staff pick” are labels easily bought and sold.

Today’s Digest on TMN: Birnbaum on the week’s books.

If advertising is now consumer-generated, are brands threatened? And why do consumers want in?

Disney organizes chicken vs. egg panel to decide question that “has baffled scientists through the ages.”

Emotions contagious like germs, say scientists.

One in six Arizona adults had their identities stolen in the last five years.

Price for which companies can purchase the personal data of all Minnesota drivers’-license holders from the state: $1,500.

The all-purpose, all-celebrity graduation speech, perhaps lacking in awesomeness.

The video game industry has no indie market, and gamers are losing out.

Case for Ernest Pignon-Ernest’s street art as high art (see images).

Mp3s: The world needs more pump organs.

Newspapers are understandably wary of printing dirty words, but what happens when a public figure says “fuck?”

New Apple store’s fancy elevator gets spinning beach ball.

Headlines for Friday, May 26, 2006

TMN will be off Mon., 29 May, in observance of Memorial Day—see you on Tuesday.

New York’s currently: crafting a swimsuit out of anything

Military investigation finds Marines murdered Iraqis, including women and children, attempted coverup.

Hamas withdraws Gaza security force after 10 days of clashes with regular police and military units.

Bush said he regretted challenging insurgents to “bring it on,” and said the same about his statement that he wanted Osama bin Laden “dead or alive.”

New Yorkers flood 311 with concerns about yesterday’s fighter flyovers.

Enron verdict finds Lay and Skilling guilty—and gives late-’90s self-centeredness a severe dressing-down.

Enron ex-employees have mixed reactions, some feel their work has been “invalidated.”

Nobody knows what caused the electrical short that shut down trains on the Eastern seaboard; passengers take their anger out on the bathrooms.

Treasury Dept. to dismantle 108-year-old tax on long-distance phone calls, refund the $13 billion it’s collected in the past three years.

Woody Allen ticked his later, unfunny movies are being edited for television.

In today’s Digest: Sarah Hepola on the week’s best videos.

“Harry Potter-style” invisibility cloak only five years away.

Pope coming to town means no alcohol, contraceptive, or tampon ads…and certainly no ice cream.

Arizona finally outlaws bestiality.

“But the wind farm looks like modernist sculpture!” Exactly. Aesthetic arguments for and against wind farms.

Walkout-inducing selections at Cannes, including Sofia Coppola’s boo-inducing Marie Antoinette.

Cate Blanchett to play Bob Dylan in upcoming biopic.

“If you wore a shirt that says abortion is homicide or abortion kills kids, then that provokes discussion…and that’s what we really want.” Christian rock activists put their faith in T-shirts.

Most of the women who took part in a 1986 study about the diminishing marriage chances of women over 30 now married.

Have a wonderful weekend: Studies show daily drinking lowers heart disease risk in men, smoking marijuana not a cause of lung cancer.

For those who refuse to wait: a map to Shake Shack alternatives.

How to make beer-battered, deep-fried, pepperoni pizza—not that you should.

Headlines for Thursday, May 25, 2006

New York’s currently: 28-hour-ing

Pelosi and Hastert demand the return of Jefferson’s yanked files.

Yanking a congressman: more a matter of etiquette than constitutional principle.

Engineers have quickly repaired the New Orleans levees, though they’re still not strong enough for even a Cat 3 storm.

You can’t compare it to the Senate floor. Bill Frist operates on a gorilla.

Passengers bravely take down plane showing Big Momma’s House 2.

The case for abolishing library fines.

Thirty years later, U.S. beats France again in wine contest, though it wasn’t without difficulties.

Progress but no punch as Security Council tries to decide on Iran package.

Soldiers grieve when their bomb-defusing robots blow up.

Female chatbot will help you quit smoking.

Op: Hysterical seems apt to describe the reaction to “The Israel Lobby,” stirring pots like no other essay in recent memory.

Photos of the 1932 Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

Ground breaks for Brooklyn tower to house formerly homeless, special-needs tenants, and low-income artists and actors.

On Bill Buford’s obsessive love for Batali, and Childs’s revolution grown in France.

Germany: Ruled by the old, for the old—but with great trains, great hospitals and a rather charming love of nudity.

Top 50 conservative rock songs, chosen by the National Review.

Sound audible only to under-20s, originally used as teenager repellant, now used by teenagers as secret ringtone.

Links for getting started in aerial archaeology.

Artistic interpretations of literary figures.

Philatelic detective reunites 1847 letter with postmaster provisional “Alexandria Blue Boy.”

Video: Implosion of a nuclear plant.

Minute-by-minute account from inside the machine that’s The Price Is Right.

When they catch and cuff your brain, the jerk even tries to bust in the cop-car window. This is your brain on drugs.

Headlines for Wednesday, May 24, 2006

New York’s currently: speeding up so we can speed back down

Iran asks U.S. for direct talks on its nuclear program—and that letter still goes unanswered.

Iraqi death squads may maintain loyalties to the government and the insurgency, and operate within the lawful bounds of Iraq’s Ministries.

In testimony, Lee Malvo lays out the second phase of John Allen Muhammad’s plot—to blow up schools, buses, and hospitals.

World Health Organization detects no mutation in bird flu—though human-to-human transmission cannot be ruled out in Indonesian deaths.

Purported bin Laden audio recording denies Moussaoui’s role in Sept. 11 attacks.

Largehearted Boy’s “Book Notes” with TMN’s Kevin Guilfoile.

When potential future inductees will be eligible for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame; next year could include R.E.M., the Beastie Boys, and Sonic Youth.

After a nine-day fast-food road trip, Frank Bruni can pin a Whataburger from miles out.

The feds may not have found Jimmy Hoffa in Milford, Mich., but Milford discovered a business in novelty T-shirts and cupcakes.

Another baseball record may soon be toppled—the Astros’ Craig Biggio has been hit by 277 pitches, 10 plunks away from the top mark.

Thirty-five hundred Germans arrested for file sharing.

New legislation holds students accountable for MySpace profiles—2,000 photos of teens holding red Solo cups deleted.

In today’s Digest, Rosecrans Baldwin on the week in Mp3s.

Two elderly California women arrested for taking out insurance on homeless men, running them down in their Honda Civic.

Cesar Millan: “In the city [dogs] become a child, they become a husband, they become a soul mate. They become something the human wants before they are willing to do what is best for them.”

The Simpsons for the blind [mp3]; knock-off Tiny Toons for the deaf [mpg]

Seventy-five years of Soviet posters.

The future of building design should be A/C-free, says architect Richard Rogers.

A (not really) secret Flickr message.

One’s natural reaction to arm-twisters of any description is to wriggle free, turn around, and kick them in the pentacles. Anthony Lane hits the Da Vinci Code where it hurts.

Headlines for Tuesday, May 23, 2006

New York’s currently: reasserting itself

Past week’s fighting in Afghanistan “most intense” since 2001; dozens killed, concerns about strengthened Taliban.

Corruption rampant throughout Iraq.

Former CIA bin Laden unit chief on why intelligence in Iran is so poor.

Burger King disgusts Muslim customers with poor cone design.

Studs Terkel and other Chicago plaintiffs sue for fear the government’s out to get them.

Plastic packaging out to get you.

Identity information of 26 million veterans stolen.

Alternative to regime change involves nose-holding as long as nuclear arms aren’t nuzzled.

Video: Follow-up interview with BBC’s “Wrong Guy.”

Germans are funnier than Brits.

High-profile attacks and plans by neo-Nazis worry German leaders over World Cup safety.

The obsession and lifestyle of tracking terrorists online: inside the SITE institute.

America is turning 400—who knew?

The story of Seattle’s Jim McDermott, Ohio’s John Boehner, and an illegally made tape of public importance.

The troubles in applying math to measuring basketball prowess.

Male parts used to attract females become disproportionately large in most species that boast them.

Finnish polka proves improbably addictive.

Everclear’s Alexakis once promised to “buy you a new life,” now withdraws offer.

Caught some allusions to The Odyssey. Nice. Feedback from Joyce’s submission of Ulysses to his creative-writing workshop.

Lagos scammers, aka “Yahoo! millionaires,” make millions off “too gullible” white people.

Video: Bad trip on Berlin’s U-Bahn.

Headlines for Monday, May 22, 2006

New York’s currently: wishing the radiator would snap back on

FBI accuses Rep. William J. Jefferson of Louisiana of taking hundreds of thousands of dollars in bribes, finds $90K in his freezer.

Air strikes on suspected Taliban stronghold in southern Afghanistan leave dozens of fighters, civilians dead.

U.S. proposes anti-missile sites in Europe that could intercept warheads from Iran, pressures European banks to reduce Iranian activities.

Joint U.S.-Turkey military exercises to focus on preventing nuclear technology from reaching Iran.

Nagin wins reelection in New Orleans, promises recovery, opportunity.

Shaky hands, phantom typing are signs you may be addicted to the internet.

From constipation during space travel to avian flu, kimchi boasts curative powers for the ills of the day—let the studies begin.

The tricky side to naming airports—many refuse to use the names, and the buildings must be re-christened.

Ian Frazier, again with the coyotes, this time an interview with the one caught in Central Park.

In certain messes, the tradition of chiding or poking good-natured fun through limericks and ditties is practiced. Army-regulation jokes.

Manhattan mugger robs deliverymen of cash, food, and bikes, then forces them to strip naked.

“What we’re doing is sort of like putting a wing on the Taj Mahal.” The very uphill battle of building near Thomas Jefferson’s original UVA campus.

“Death coaches” gives support to the grieving—and could alter the face of hospice care.

For those who can’t remember Old Testament laws, LEGO storyboards can help.

Sunny Delight poisons spring, fish.

When asked if he would consider giving [the ball] to Bonds, Snyder declined with a mild expletive.

American television places characters in coffee shops, but Bollywood sets scenes in call centers.

Berkeley’s “Naked Guy” dies in jail.

[Ian] McCulloch hated the name, and so they became the Crucial Three, a group who just talked about being a group, and how legendary they would be.

Mp3s: Many bands, many covers of “Love Will Tear Us Apart.”

Video: Garbage day plus maniacal laughter.

Headlines for Friday, May 19, 2006

New York’s currently: constantly calibrating for marginally better outcomes

Egypt resumes repression; State department “deeply troubled”; Bush hosts secret visit by Mubarak’s son.

Iraq’s middle class doing everything it can to flee.

Now that access is reduced to the minimum required, inspectors have few tools to gauge Iran’s nuke program.

Senate votes English as the “national language.”

Even Joseph Gannascoli doesn’t know how GaVito dies, but he’d like to keep paying his mortgage.

Light-blocking smog over Indian Ocean suppresses global warming—what happens if the air gets cleaned up?

Forests disappearing from the roof of the world.

Today in TMN’s new Digest feature: Videos of the Week.

U.S. should close any secret “war on terror” detention facilities, plus Guantanamo, says U.N.

Novelist thinks people shrug 10 times more than they actually do.

Airline ticket stub, nabbed from trash can, reveals wild amount of passenger info in 15 minutes.

Alexandria, Egypt has the world’s worst theme park, Fantazy Land.

McCartney and wife blame media for divorce; CNN effectively proves their point.

Video: Game shows are better played in libraries.

Decade by decade, the history of Archie comics shows a strong dislike for teen culture.

Research suggests early humans got busy with chimps; some scientists have trouble imagining the coupling.

Russian mothers prefer lack of second child to cash.

Insider’s report from last night’s NYC Beard & Moustache Championship.

Report with pictures from the third Dashanzi International Art Festival in Beijing.

Heroic computer dies to save world from master’s thesis.

4,512 Ph.D. students died to make blog about synthesis.

Oak Island Treasure is dedicated to those who have lost their lives in the search for the elusive treasure of the Money Pit.

Chef Masayoshi “Masa” Takayama tests 10 Santoku knives straight from the box.

Video: 10 Things I Hate About Commandments.

Headlines for Thursday, May 18, 2006

New York’s currently: not walking through that bunch of pigeons

A peace treaty could clear the path toward new nuclear talks between North Korea and the U.S.

Hamas deploys Palestinian security force—a move Abbas vetoed last month.

Conflicts between Taliban fighters and police in Afghanistan take a sharp rise.

U.S. soldiers in Iraq will begin using laser devices at checkpoints to temporarily blind suspicious drivers.

“Virtual fence” of surveillance technology to be assembled at U.S-Mexico border; real, 370-mile-long fence will also be built.

After 13 years and $24 billion, China’s dam on the Yangtze River is now the largest hydroelectric flood-control structure in the world.

The final chromosome in the human genome has been sequenced—here’s what that means.

Tired of being kicked around and unappreciated, fast-food empires start slinging at Fast Food Nation.

It’s like Netflix for wine: Introducing Cork’d, the social network for wine lovers.

Video: How J. Robert Lennon writes his novels.

By addressing eye fungus one region at a time, Bausch & Lomb fueled its own scandal.

“Today’s really a good day to be a millionaire, but it’s a bad day if you want to be a millionaire.” Bush approves embattled tax cuts.

Inflation is up, the Dow is (way) down, and the economy’s growth party got crashed by “an uninvited drunken uncle.”

We have a winner in our “Sloppy Seconds With Opal Mehta” contest! Bonnie Furlong and “The Parlourmaid’s Tale, or, MS in a Dustbin.”

Of course, all of gentrified Brooklyn is somewhat similar. It’s mostly white. It’s mostly partial to some form of indie rock. The war between Park Slope and Williamsburg.

Coming soon: Neptune-class planets you can live on, possibly.

Learning to draw: today’s lesson—salt shakers and pepper grinders.

The capital-markets division of Barclays Plc could be the Red Hot Chili Peppers; chaotic in the 1990s, gained some focus in the early years of this decade. Matching banks to bands.

Tracking the trend called Morrissey.

Video: 37 short Fluxus Films (1962-1970).

Headlines for Wednesday, May 17, 2006

New York’s currently: hoping for more peaks, fewer valleys

White House agrees to brief intel committees on wiretapping operation.

Verizon denies turning over your local calls to the spooks—though it may be happy to share your long-distance bills.

A moving defense of selling crack.

FBI tracking reporters’ phone records to stymie leaks; reporters’ sources urge them to get new cell phones.

Nigerian senate rejects amendment to allow Olusegun a third term.

Somalia’s prime minister blames secret U.S. support of warlords for clashes in Mogadishu.

A.U. soldiers in Sudan hamstrung by limited mandate, few troops, bad equipment.

If you love Russia, you have to love Godunov. Condoleezza Rice’s 10 favorite musical works.

Senate immigration overhaul stands test, but House won’t budge for Bush, and nobody’s happy with the GOP.

Op: Bush’s border army is classic Clintonian sleight of hand.

Photos of female Israeli soldiers.

Schedule of events for upcoming Brooklyn Performing Arts Festival. (See also the upcoming New York Beard & Moustache Championship.)

The history of the yellow legal pad.

Playboy’s 25 sexiest novels includes Wind-Up Bird.

Massive soccer corruption scandal horrifies but doesn’t shock Italian fans.

Today in TMN’s new Digest: The week’s best mp3s.

Mp3 bloggers choose their favorite visceral moments.

New incentive package for Iran includes light-water nuclear reactor for civilian use.

California city won’t rename street after Trump unless he renames his golf club after the city.

Retirement tips from retirees.

TMN’s Kevin Guilfoile reading tonight, Schuler Books in Michigan.

Five die from bird flu in Indonesia; official says possibility of human-to-human transmission can’t be ruled out.

New York cab driver lets his fares influence where he finds his burgers.

Op: No matter how much you love your favorite classic racist novel, it still may need to be discarded.

Central Park to sport free WiFi by summer.

Video: Twenty movies digitized from the Lang Papers, touring the mid-century Southwest.

Headlines for Tuesday, May 16, 2006

New York’s currently: grilling reality stars

New border deployment means National Guard units will swap training for border stints, where they won’t provide military force.

Op: In immigration address, Bush searches for the middle ground that’s already on the Senate floor. [Transcript here.]

Bush disappoints those on both sides of the immigration debate—yes, that would be the middle ground.

Fox tries to allay fears in Mexico of military action along the border; few buy it.

And now: What about Canada?

Four days of violence in Sao Paulo leave more than 80 dead, including 39 police officers, in attacks directed by inmates with cell phones.

Many believe Karl Rove has been indicted—and denials of the rumor only help to cement the belief.

Five-hundred-pound German bomb from World War II found in River Mersey.

Stanley Kunitz, former poet laureate, dies at 100.

U.S., Libya restore diplomatic ties; proof, many say, the Bush administration wants oil more than democracy.

Saddam Hussein finally reaches indictment, which may bring him one major step closer to execution.

What would happen to the bumper-sticker industry? Boulder may unveil “hate hotline.”

Biotech firm makes rice that could eradicate diarrhea—and it’s engineered with a human gene.

BBC interviews technology expert, gets taxi driver instead. [Video here.] Update: He wasn’t a cabbie, and he wanted an I.T. job.

A musical realization of the motion graphics of John Whitney as described in his book Digital Harmony.

Major League Baseball wants fantasy league companies to pay for players’ names and stats.

Scottsdale residents express concern over local branch of Vegas eatery, the Pink Taco; no reaction from Tucson about its new nude dude ranch.

What do teens do if nobody smokes and drinks anymore? Prescription drugs.

Pee-Wee Herman warns on the dangers of crack cocaine.

Headlines for Monday, May 15, 2006

New York’s currently: got its fingers crossed on a number of fronts

Bush to call for thousands of National Guard troops to play border patrol.

Iraqi police, often suspected in Sunni killings, under close watch by U.S. troops.

200,000 slums in the world.

Half of gadgets returned to stores are in good working order—customers just can’t figure out how to use them.

Bosnian Indiana Jones insists rocks are world’s largest pyramid.

News events to anticipate in the week ahead.

Memorial competition winner Michael Arad on Ground Zero’s astounding costs and conflicts.

The story of Yankees Stadium’s Freddy Schuman and his good-luck pan and spoon.

Popular Mechanics do-it-yourself projects.

Mystery disease sprouts in southern Texas—lesions, tarry sweat, sprouting fibers.

British politicians loved The West Wing because its lack of cynicism would never been filmed at Whitehall.

One-minute audio vacations.

American Photo’s best photographers of the internet.

The history of Orrin Hatch making music, with photos.

Updike: The sensations that Houellebecq gives us are not nutritive.

Video: Pseudo-Corky stars in pre-Guffman You Wouldn’t Believe Our World.

Sony’s strategy to co-opt Christians for the release of The Da Vinci Code.

Eric Umansky interviews Iran observer Afshin Molavi.

Podcast now available for WNYC’s superb “Radio Lab” program.

The Port Authority does not enjoy being insulted by E-ZPass hoaxers.

In light of proper thank-you note writing, “Thanks for the Intervention.”

TMN announces new section, “Digest,” with weekly round-ups of books, mp3s, and web videos.

Video: Siskel and Ebert really didn’t like Protestants.

Headlines for Friday, May 12, 2006

New York’s currently: breeding carrier pigeons, learning smoke signals

Bush defends vast domestic telephone-record surveillance; says it’s lawful, doesn’t mention under what laws.

“Considerable circumstantial evidence” now links al Qaeda to the July 7 London bombings.

In foiled Australian threat, terrorists planned to send secret messages, pretending to be women texting each other.

Men lost at sea text for help.

How low can it go? The Decider’s approval rating hits 29 percent.

Pelosi says if Dems win control of House in November, they won’t seek impeachment.

“It’s so easy to say yes. The government sings a patriotic song, and you want to do what’s right.” Somewhere between lawmakers and your privacy are very confused technology companies.

Islamic religious leaders call on Muslim countries to provide aid to Palestinians.

Egyptian police club pro-democracy demonstrators, as well as journalists covering the event.

South Korean scientist with fake stem-cell work now charged with real fraud and embezzlement.

Wal-Mart plans summer foray into organic foods; whether or not this is at all good for organic farmers—or consumers—remains to be seen.

Tired of Viswanathan getting the spotlight, Frey admits his sequel is fiction.

Remember, the deadline for entries into the “Sloppy Seconds With Opal Mehta” plagiarism contest is tonight!

Soraya, 2004 Latin Grammy winner, breast cancer crusader, dies at 37.

Neil MacLennan remembers the fun he and his friends had as boys playing in the funny candy-colored swamps and ponds near the ballfields. Mass. town faced with cancer fears.

Researchers find white-blood cells from cancer-immune mice, when injected into other mice, cures tumors, gives lifelong immunity.

China gets domestic Wikipedia, to be censored by hosting company.

Eschewing “the shared human experience” by getting somebody else to wait in line for you at Shake Shack.

What it’s like to discover your favorite cartoon hero is your favorite gay cartoon hero.

Dean Young, “Blondie” comic-strip cartoonist, to open sandwich chain.

Better than a liger, hunters nab half grizzly and half polar bear.

Video: Roxy Music performing “Remake/Remodel” live in 1973.

Headlines for Thursday, May 11, 2006

New York’s currently: serving in the rain

NSA building “world’s largest database” to contain every call ever made within the U.S.

Skinny physicians in love evangelize thinning America.

A.M. Rosenthal dies at 84. George Lutz dies at 59.

The U.S. is not publishing more books than ever—in 2005 it published 18,000 fewer titles than 2004.

Confessions of an eBay store worker.

U.K. to pay off the last of its WWII loans from the U.S. in December.

Congress delays release of Army manual allowing tougher rules for irregular fighters, i.e., not fitting a “uniform standard” for treating detainees.

America’s fastest-growing minority; Russia’s fast-approaching extinction.

Russia to boost its military strength to counter the U.S., aka “Comrade Wolf.”

Op: Continue Russia-bashing through the megaphone, Westies, and witness cheering Kremlin hard-liners.

Drunk monkeys behave like humans.

Study: Human intoxication does not transform alligators into docile creatures that enjoy wrestling.

Older pop critics in print use Pitchfork to maintain credibility.

Nice overview of main players in Norway’s death metal scene, including mp3s.

Star of Star & Buc Wild fired after threatening to “R. Kelly” rival DJ’s daughter.

More girls in a congressman’s family, more likely he is to vote liberal on “women’s issues.”

Why doesn’t my belly button heal over?

Mother bakes laxative cookies for teacher; teacher passes cookies out to students.

Apples appear to be besting oranges.

Former and current presidents Bush want trifecta, say Jeb would be great in the White House.

Those crazy Itals! “Contentiously (No Surprise), Italians Name New President.”

Time still left to see Lee Mullican’s paintings, or Army of Shadows.

Industrially produced corn is what feeds famine victims, not the technicolor Swiss chard from your local farmers’ market.

Attention copycats! Tomorrow is the TMN “Sloppy Seconds With Opal Mehta” Contest deadline!

Video: The original Bottle Rocket.

Headlines for Wednesday, May 10, 2006

New York’s currently: stuck somewhere between 20 and 30 percent gray

Republicans in Congress negotiate five-year, $70 billion tax break; see the chart to find out how much you get.

Is support for this regime in line with the teachings of Jesus Christ (PBUH) or Moses (PBUH) or liberal values? The letter Bush received from President Ahmadinejad; more on “PBUH.”

E.U., U.N., Russia, and U.S. set up international aid channel for Palestinians that will bypass Hamas.

U.S., Europe to reach out to Iran with more carrots than exploding carrots, for now.

In Baghdad, Sunnis form neighborhood militias to guard against Shiite police death squads.

Immigrant advocates in U.S. want 1 million new citizens before November elections.

Clean record on human rights not a prerequisite for joining the U.N.’s Human Rights Council; the U.S. did not run for a seat.

New Yorkers! Prepare for a hurricane, because… you haven’t for a while.

Armored suits look goofy; bionic suits offer super-strength.

“The crashes were shot in one take, using real stunt people and real, non-reinforced Jettas.” The story behind those Volkswagen ads.

Video: Scott Walker on the Culture Show. Amazing.

Europe, land of many cakes.

The Six-Minute Project is a collaborative multimedia experiment in which people upload 24 hours of their life, six minutes at a time.

Video: Charlie White is pink for Adidas.

Where do the chemicals from the antibacterial soap you use in your bathroom end up? Why, spread on farm fields, naturally.

China wants Guantanamo-ians back from Albania.

German convicted of murder, not just “killing on demand,” and gets life in prison.

NYC when the sea levels rise.

410-pound man (now about 300 pounds) arrives in New York after walking from Oceanside, Calif.

Space colony art from the 1970s.

As it turns out, women can look at a man’s face to determine his worthiness as a mate. (Mickey Rourke scored low.)

Photos: Matchbox cars, color-coded.

Headlines for Tuesday, May 9, 2006

New York’s currently: having the longest real spring in recent years

White House calls Iranian president’s letter a ploy. See also, when to lob.

Moussaoui would like to retract his guilty plea because now, he says, he understands he can get a fair trial in America.

At least 30 killed in Iraq yesterday.

Did former CIA executive director “Dusty” steer contracts to friend Wilkes, aka “bud of Duke”?

The monumental task of warning future generations.

A great deal of what purported to be humor related to the Director and his age. FBI report/review of Laugh-In episode.

Columbia students and street cons.

David Blaine fails to set breath-holding record, lasts 7 minutes after spending 177 hours under water.

Final year of swim tests for U.N.C graduates; few colleges still require their grads to tread.

EBay is not where you want to spend a fortune on art.

Little Sister protects China’s internet.

I really believed that they were real, they were true. The case of the Nigerian letter scammers and a Massachusetts psychotherapist.

Nigerian mp3 blog, Naija Jams.

South Africa’s Zuma is cleared of rape, says he’s sorry he didn’t use a condom.

U.N. aid workers exploiting girls throughout Liberaia, says report.

Profile of Popbitch, the email newsletter we can’t seem to unsubscribe from.

A brief history of “baby-daddies” and “baby-mamas.”

Nature’s worst mothers: blood drinkers, infant abandoners, those who feed baby flesh to siblings.

Scientists pick the top 10 sci-fi films.

There are lots of causes for yawns, but why are yawns contagious?

The remarkably high-tech world of selling, scoring, and scamming World Cup tickets.

Front page Times articles soon to have, hopefully, fewer anecdotal leads.

Neil Diamond on his unlikely immigrant-rights theme song.

Sixty-four versions of “Stairway to Heaven.”

Headlines for Monday, May 8, 2006

New York’s currently: through fields of cattle, through fields of cane

Amid intense G.O.P. criticism, White House nominates Gen. Michael Hayden for CIA director role.

Over the weekend in Baghdad, 43 bodies were found, each shot at close range; series of car bombs kills 14.

White House to Dept. of Agriculture: Find new ways to work strategy for victory in Iraq into all of your speeches.

Iran to U.N.: If you tell us we can’t continue our nuclear program, we’re not listening.

Iranian president sends letter to Bush, proposing “new solutions” to the current international discord.

Rove riles Republicans with rumblings about losing control of Congress, though the chances of that kind of shift are slim compared to 12 years ago.

National Guard duty in Iraq has been greatly downsized, less than half as many are deployed as a year ago.

Go-Betweens singer Grant McLennan, 48, died in his sleep on Saturday.

Judge rules in favor of Computer over Corps in Apple vs. Apple trademark case.

Video: Thug-loving Jesus.

Fred Flintstone never made a lot of money. His name was never in the tablets. He was not the finest cartoon character ever drawn. Flintstone, through the pages of history.

TMN’s David Leite and Linda Avery, proprietors of Leite’s Culinaria, win 2006 James Beard Award for Food Website.

Chinese village gets divorces to get free apartments; Spanish town can’t get a date to save its life—but it will have to.

Consider this man armed and married.

Man whose heart has already been removed awaits transplant, and waits, and waits.

Boy’s eating habits spark protests, accusations of racism.

“The sound of the tuba—I could relate to it. I remember one of my first solos: the Rocky theme. The secret lives of the National Symphony Orchestra.

Last American Titanic survivor, Lillian Gertrud Asplund, dies at 99.

Video: Tom Cruise tries to dance, cannot move feet.

Headlines for Friday, May 5, 2006

New York’s currently: cinco de everything

Senate passes $109 billion emergency spending bill for wars, hurricanes, and Rhode Island.

Largest Darfur rebel group agrees to peace deal—two smaller groups are unhappy with the terms, however.

Building costs for WTC memorial steaming toward $1 billion—will planning begin anew?

Cheney sends “heavily vetted” barbs toward Russia; please note: All of these men are smiling.

1) Zarqawi releases videos to mock U.S.; 2) U.S. finds video outtakes, releases them to mock Zarqawi.

Newly discovered memo may prove Zarqawi is exploiting sectarian violence in Iraq.

The minimum number of players is clearly four: three men on and one batting. That’s how we played: four people on a side. We tried baseball and it didn’t work.

Study says full-time, stay-at-home mothers could command a salary of $134,121; scientists say hot dads don’t always equal hot sons.

New Penguin editions with cool covers are so good you’ll want to eat them.

This Sunday’s Fort Green Association House Tour includes a stop at the top of the Williamsburgh Savings Bank to enjoy the views.

Why we answer our cellphones when no one is calling.

Andrew Lauren, son of Ralph, wants TMN’s Kevin Guilfoile to write the screenplay for Cast of Shadows, the movie.

Rep. Kennedy prefaces announcement of a traffic accident with: “I consumed no alcohol prior to the incident.”

The corruption surrounding Boston’s Big Dig.

John Cage said to play his organ piece as slow as possible; note four starts today.

The only thing worse than Godsmack is being the lead singer of Godsmack during this interview.

In short, did sampling jump the shark, or was it pushed?

Are you a Dylanist or an Enoid?

“Tropical diseases are here to stay in Canada.” Global warming has unexpected, deadly effects.

Welcoming new advertisers to the Deck this week: 5inch and scanR.

Undersecretary of agriculture visits sixth-grade science classes to argue why cutting down trees is a good thing, gets no takers.

New Yorkers pick up their dogs’ poo—Texans do not.

Audio: 42 hours with Buckminster Fuller.

If you wanted, you could watch a lot of TV right now.

Headlines for Thursday, May 4, 2006

New York’s currently: brewing coffee with coffee, metaphorically

Jury doesn’t reach consensus and Moussaoui gets life sentence.

Op: Witness a noble jury refusing a terrorist his martyrdom and a state its scapegoat.

House narrowly passes Abramoff-inspired lobbying legislation that’s a far cry from promised bill.

Picasso portrait, “Dora Maar With Cat,” sells for $95.2 million.

Enormous belly button gives away fake Van Dyck.

Royal member discovered loose in the sand surrounding King Tut.

France’s de Villepin insists he never targeted Sarko, sees slander campaign swirling around, much like his hair.

The magic roundabout of Swindon, absolutely terrifying to American eyes.

Thieves use laptops to crack keyless-entry cars, e.g., David Beckham’s.

There is no need for an auxiliary power supply. Proposal for an Arizona SWAT unit to begin employing monkeys.

“Gun-shaped teddy bear crackers ready to liven up wedding receptions.”

If you can walk a quarter-mile, you’ll probably last six more years.

U.S. bird flu plan missing a key element: how to pay for it.

Thighspace.com? Couchsurfers employ web to skip hotels while traveling, preferring your spare loveseat.

KGB Bar launches KGBBarLit magazine.

Times blogs written by U.S. soldiers becoming excellent narratives.

Comic-book Superrman impervious to copyediting.

Examples of Disney’s self-plagiarization. (Very Mehta of them, if you ask us.)

You’re a fool if you don’t take my advice. Mr. T’s advice show to debut in October.

Wired’s appreciation of Alinea’s nouveau food, better seen here.

George “Hamburger America” Motz’s 15 favorite burgers in the U.S.

Eighty best places to eat out in Paris.

Wine lovers who can’t recognize complexity in fine beers need to hurdle their hang-ups.

Core classical recordings of the 20th century.

Los Angeles as experienced in 1907.

How David Blaine may manage to hold his breath for nine minutes.

Postal Service proposes a “forever stamp” to suffice forever for first-class mail.

The Bruckheimer Quatrains.

Headlines for Wednesday, May 3, 2006

New York’s currently: finding Greenpoint ashes in Fort Greene and thinking, seems familiar

Mexico’s Fox to legalize nearly all popular drugs and narcotics for personal use.

The scale of this year’s spring Taliban attacks alarms officials, though the Taliban doesn’t make the U.S.’s list of terrorists.

State Department offers four Spanish versions of the “Star-Spangled Banner.”

Republicans’ $100 gas rebate is dead, and S.U.V. sales are sharply down, except for GM’s new trucks.

NASA announces plan to launch $700 million into space.

Three convicted in 2004 Munch thefts; $121 million repayment to be dropped if paintings are found.

Research money may be cut for Bush’s laser weapon.

Brooklyn fire that ripped through Greenpoint’s waterfront yesterday was the largest in a decade, excepting 9/11.

All the signs point to blogspot—Bin Laden is a left-wing blogger.

Two-thirds of college-age Americans can’t find Iraq on a map; half can’t find New York.

Baby Einstein and Brainy Baby companies accused of false advertising.

Four out of 10 women in Hong Kong, Malaysia, the Philippines, South Korea, and Taiwan use skin-whitening cream.

Want to lose weight? Drink delicious unroasted coffee.

ABC fluff piece on Google promotes gagging by second paragraph.

Nearly a year into the Roberts court and procedure is more polite, less predictive, and perhaps more inquisitive.

Real-world ATM card offered for virtual online game.

His nipples are autographed. Really, I could just stop there. Hot chicks with douchebags.

The Great Gatsby by John Kenny, author also of White Noise.

The wisdom of street food.

The new right: whole-grain, crunchy aesthetic-minded conservatives.

Democrats use midterm ballot initiatives to split and stymie Republicans.

Tommy Frank says fire-breathing anarchy may be just what Dems need to embrace.

Videos: TV in Japan.

Headlines for Tuesday, May 2, 2006

New York’s currently: developing an allergy for every situation

Hundreds of thousands of immigrants skip work, school in peaceful protests across the U.S.

Yesterday’s demonstrations employed multiple tactics—though some proved more successful than others.

Iraqi army graduation turns ugly when Sunni grads are told they will have to serve outside their province, prompting fears of run-ins with Shiite death squads.

David Blaine begins goldfish act in Lincoln Center.

Passages from a third novel, Sophie Kinsella’s Can You Keep a Secret?, show up in Kaavya Viswanathan’s book; we think you can do better.

Qatar announces $60 million in grants for the victims of Hurricane Katrina.

Puerto Rico’s schools and federal offices shut down until government finds some more money.

Egypt’s “important civilizing step” is a single Cairo-wide call to prayer.

Inflation soars out of control in Zimbabwe; price of toilet paper hits $417 a sheet.

Anna Nicole Smith wins her Supreme Court case.

The court rules unanimously that Anna Nicole looks better than she has looked in years. What if the Court ruled for cable?

“The thing that always gets me is watching people send emails.” Twenty years of sloppy Hollywood versions of the internet.

No intersection: the 10 sexiest cars for 2006, the 10 most fuel-efficient cars for 2006.

The Vatican rethinks its position on condoms.

Archbishop of York gets in touch with the younger generation by wearing a hoodie.

“I always call him Lewis Carroll Carroll, because he was the first Humbert Humbert.” The Photography of Lewis Carroll.

The top 10 creepiest Depeche Mode songs.

Looking for a Starbucks? You won’t find one here: The Starbucks delocator.

Are we worthy of our kitchens?

Headlines for Monday, May 1, 2006

New York’s currently: grape crazy!

Deadline for Darfur peace agreement passes with no accord.

Kadima signs up Shas for coalition government in Israel (by leaving evacuating settlements off the table).

White House plan to lower gas prices won’t do much, says White House.

Even Limbaugh feels whored by Republican $100 coupon plan.

Candid camera catches Dennis Hastert ditching hydrogen-fueled car for his SUV.

Pissed off about gas prices? Blame your rich trader buddies.

Who decides when the flag should go half-mast? You do.

Due to bugle player shortage, Pentagon purchased hundreds of “Taps” emulators.

Bush reserves the right to be above 750 laws.

Video: Black person visits Aspen. See also, Colbert visits the Correspondents’ Dinner.

Whether choking on chicken or saving lives, celebrities have an alarming amount of Heimlich moments.

Rocks in Your Head record store no longer able to afford Soho rent, moving to Williamsburg.

The history of the proverbial “little guy.”

Packer: If only the logic of desperation—a period of separation between groups, perhaps?—for some wisdom in Iraq right now.

Free Berkeley classes on iTunes; MoMA podcasts to guide your art walks.

Robots as included in fine art.

So the joke goes: Eighty people in royal blue polos walk into a Manhattan Best Buy.

Details behind the brother-on-brother civil war to succeed in Hasidic Williamsburg.

Texas Ranch House hits the airwaves tonight.

The truth behind Opus Dei’s Manhattan headquarters: it’s a non-campy frat house, they swear.

Sedaris: Being dead for 300 years, there’s a lot a skeleton doesn’t understand.

In the ’80s, this sport had a very serious cocaine problem—and that was a pretty consistent pattern. The incredible, terrible chronology of Steve Howe’s life.

Video: Top 10 ping pong shots.

TODAY’S FEATURE

Iggy Pop Lusts for Life

More than four decades into his career as a rock mentor, Iggy Pop chats with PATRICK AMBROSE about getting back with the Stooges and finding a daily rhythm that suits him.

DIGEST

Feeling for Iceland

Iceland is having a tough time at the moment. With a little experimental music—though nothing post rock—the bubbling pop and folk sounds of Sin Fang Bous remind us of Iceland’s ability to charm, hypnotize.

My Incredulous Face

Holiday Travel Hell

Nicole Pasulka compiles tales of horror from the TMN writers.

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The Morning News Annual 2008

Introducing our year-end print edition. Favorites from the past year, plus new pieces by some of your favorite TMN writers.

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