Headlines: July 2006 - The Morning News

Headlines for Friday, July 21, 2006

New York’s currently: playing tourist

Urged by Israeli troops to evacuate, residents of Southern Lebanon leave, but for where they don’t know.

A horrific account of the current state of Tyre, in Southern Lebanon.

Bakeries in Baghdad are at the center of the sectarian strife.

Every year, 1.5 million Americans are injured or killed due to medication errors.

But I’m like, Dude, maybe I didn’t go to film school but I know what sells, right? I invented the friggin iPod, okay? Have you heard of it? The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs.

Form some sort of opinion about your personal originality by comparing clicks.

Mimi Demayo, porn star running for NV governor, afraid voters are not taking her seriously.

New Zealand policewoman is still taken seriously despite second job as prostitute.

Son who avoided defrosting his mother not in so much trouble.

King Tut’s gem is just glass, but from there on it gets real freaky.

Brookings Institution finds that low-income families pay far too much for food and housing.

It’s those pesky kids—not journalists—who are writing those “Web logs, known as blogs.”

Congress gets its stem cell facts wrong.

When public figures curse, the asterisks become confusing.

“In some ways, people are a lot like animals.” Kevin scratches himself and doesn’t shower. That’s like an animal. Britney’s poetry improved by running commentary.

Did Pynchon speak via Amazon?

Sarah Hepola on the week in videos.

Red Rover, Musical Chairs, Slip and Slide: The most violent children’s games.

One-man panty raid ends quickly.

The Athanasius Kircher Society’s Lesser Known Museum Week wraps up; highlights include Leila’s Hair Museum, the Museum of the Counterfeit, and the Swedish Nose Academy.

Pet gators are no good if they don’t have the name of our Lord on their side.

Headlines for Thursday, July 20, 2006

New York’s currently: sitting on the engine driver’s lap

Israel dumps 23 tons of bombs on suspected bunker of Hezbollah leader; Hezbollah says no members were hurt in the attack.

U.N. warns civilian deaths and “indiscriminate shelling” in Lebanon, Israel, and Gaza could constitute war crimes.

Whoa! I can sure feel the glory bumps after reading this thread! The current Mideast conflict has message boards very excited about the second coming of Christ.

Author’s autobiography claims she is the living Da Vinci Code.

Iran promises answer on nuclear incentives package in a month.

Scattering ashes on golf courses and from the backs of Harleys: Baby boomers plan their funerals.

TMN T-shirts—not appropriate for burial, but in 50 years, who knows?

The water system that delivers 1.3 billion gallons a day to the city has been clouded by particles of clay… that make the water look like chocolate Yoo-hoo.

Buddhism experiences revival in steppes of Mongolia.

East German museum offers interactive fun with bugged room, beatings with hoses; OK, no beating with hoses.

Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), is wanted by the Crown for falsely impersonating a Rolling Stone. Anthony Lane loves a good pirate joke.

Keith Richards to receive pardon from governor for Arkansas traffic stop 30 years ago.

Japan will predict the weather 30 years from now.

Despite growing fuel and environmental concerns, across the U.S. states are boosting the speed limit, in some places up to 80 m.p.h.

Celebrity cookbooks often contain the recipes of someone else—someone whose name never graces the cover.

The 50 albums that changed the course of musical history, with examples of their lasting influence.

Mp3s: The unofficial albums of Brian Eno.

A look at the classic 1920s California homes that were originally built from mail-order kits.

Video: The crew of the Enterprise visit Monty Python’s Camelot.

Headlines for Wednesday, July 19, 2006

New York’s currently: storing cold air behind closed doors

Israel’s strategy: a continued military campaign in Lebanon—toppling Hezbollah is the objective.

Bush supports Israel’s campaign to stop Hezbollah, says Iran must be isolated.

Isn’t this a lot of bloodshed over two soldiers? “Proportionality is not compared to the event, but to the threat, and the threat is bigger and wider than the captured soldiers.”

But it isn’t the beginning of World War III—because the world doesn’t operate in quite the same way anymore.

The humanitarian crisis in Lebanon is escalating, with a half million people driven from their homes—food, water, and medicine are in short supply.

A New Orleans doctor and two nurses have been arrested for giving lethal injections to four elderly patients in the midst of Katrina’s aftermath.

In Indonesia, where the tsunami death toll has reached 531, rumors of another tsunami causes mass panic, stampede inland.

Study shows the effect the Atlantic Yards project will have on Brooklyn—more traffic, more shadows, more sewage.

Andrew Womack on sort-of cover versions.

I transferred it to an iPod and discovered that Mozart requires 9.77 gigabytes. Alex Ross listens to Mozart—all of it.

Airport cell phone lots replace obsessively circling for hours, probably for the better.

A racist ringtone is offending South Africans.

If you can’t prove the existence of telepathy with regular playing cards, try it with advanced virtual reality gaming.

There’s some other stuff too, like this new technology that reads your mind or something and synchs with your iPod and your shoes somehow to track your workout, but I don’t know about that.

Just like in The Poseidon Adventure: Cruise ship bound for New York lists, seemed about to flip over.

Just like in The Omen: Wal-Mart hires ex-nun.

Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle, Barbershop, Scent of a Woman among the first cinema gems you’ll be able to download from Hollywood.

Video: F-bombing with The Big Lebowski.

Headlines for Tuesday, July 18, 2006

New York’s currently: panting, just to see if it works

As the Senate gets ready to approve federal funding of stem-cell research, Bush readies his veto button.

Op: The President’s morality is holding back our scientific advancement; no, that would be the fault of scientific patents.

Federal “pregnancy resource centers” are misleading women, telling them abortions can cause breast cancer, infertility.

Outside Shiite shrine in southern Iraq, 59 die as car bomber loads up day laborers in a van laced with explosives.

France and Italy have evacuated 1,600 Europeans from Lebanon to Cyprus; Americans, on the other hand, may need to pay the U.S. government to get a ride out.

Records that indicate a freelance writer is dead turn out to be tough to correct.

France in a tizzy over its first black anchorman.

Poorly written legislation means livestock farmers get disaster compensation even without a disaster.

Wal-Mart set to begin MySpace-like social web site, in-store healthcare.

TMN’s Kevin Guilfoile gets made by the Outfit, which is the Chicago mob, and also a group of Chicago crime writers.

Illustrated interview with indie flick wunderkind Richard Linklater, or “what it’s like to produce a metric ton of frames of Keanu Reeves.”

Guy who does yoga finds a way to mention that he does yoga.

Mickey Spillane dies, age 88.

He did show a knack for connecting to the basest impulses of the crowd by deploying his most effective licks at key moments to elicit a powerful crowd reaction. Pat Metheny on Kenny G.

People avoid highbrow movies whenever possible.

Converse footwear as waistwear.

Stock-car kid too young to enter the go-kart arena at local amusement park.

A map depicting the growth of the U.S. obesity epidemic over the past 20 years.

The TV Single Dad must be seen in an active parental role, living with and providing support for the children without assistance from their biological mother or stepmother.

How to “prost” in 50 languages.

Don’t rub in your sunscreen.