Headlines: January 2003 - The Morning News

Everybody waited with bated breath for the terror to be over. Then, from the very heart of the band room, the noise began. Marching band fan fiction.

The Atlantic puts together a far more interesting and thought-provoking State of the Union than anything you’ll see tomorrow night.

In case you forgot, New York landmarks to have new names with corporate sponsorship.

Marine allowed to postpone duty until service on American Idol is completed.

New Zealand cows cloned to make cheese faster.

Teddy Roosevelt wished Dante had seen the Bowery. Related: 8 short stories about architecture.

The pleasure of marriage is being able to finally stop having sex.

Visits with New York street vendors.

Anthony Lane on Lost in La Mancha and The Guru.

It’s sort of the American way to go up and down the ladder, maybe several times in a lifetime. And I’ve had a real long up—along the way my heels being bitten at for various reasons, maybe perfectionism, or maybe exactitude, or something. And now I’ve had a long way down. Martha Stewart on a scandal out of her control.

Leave it to the Chicago Tribune: Literature inspired by coldness.

Headlines for Friday, January 24, 2003

New York’s currently: wearing a big hat, according to some guy on the subway

Department for Homeland Security begins today.

Concerned about possible biological attack, U.S. government to begin civilian smallpox vaccinations, starting with Connecticut; key party, thank-you notes to follow.

Bright red brick walls cut at intervals by black cast-iron railings; semicircular stone stairwells you could see from the outside; pointed and square-topped towers spiking the sky: A life with the Cobble Hill Towers.

Jeff Stryker, ex-porn star, begins new career as a country singer. Hear a clip of one of his songs, ‘Pop You In the Pooper.’

Jay-Z quitting music, going into acting (says ‘he wants to follow in the footsteps of Eminem and act in a feature film’), claims next album will be his last.

New York harbor records geochemical fingerprint of WTC collapse.

‘The worst band ever?’ Meet the Cheeky Girls and their hit song ‘Touch My Bum.’

Now proven that sex sells beer. [via os] Related: Ads Are Stupid.

Cartoons drawn on the back of business cards.

And, yes, it’s still waaaaaay too cold outside.

Headlines for Thursday, January 23, 2003

New York’s currently: shocked Russell got this far

Bush gets anti-environment plan backed as the Senate slashes clean air regulations.

City approves Christo project to install 23 miles of saffron-colored fabric in Central Park.

PBS gets the Web: Two films follow the 1998 investigation of James Byrd, Jr.’s death in Jasper, Texas, after being dragged behind a truck by three whites.

Bush picks Jerry Thacker who calls AIDS the ‘gay plague,’ to serve on the Presidential Advisory Commission on HIV & AIDS. Related: Archive of Thacker’s Scepter Institute’s live presentations, including ‘Help for Homosexuals’ with tips on how to convert ‘those practicing this deathstyle.’

Condoleeza Rice: Why We Know Iraq is Lying.

Calvin Trillin weighs in on the culinary delights of Wisconsin.

Wireless-Web being installed at Everest base camp.

Introduction to the Voynich Manuscript, the most mysterious manuscript in the world.

Bush touts his economic plan in front of a painted screen of boxes labeled ‘Made in U.S.A’ while the real boxes hid behind, stamped ‘Made in China.’

Archive of Heston Blumenthal columns, including why to cook meat long and slow.

[The American Left] seems content to do yoga and gender studies, leaving the fundamentalist Christian right and the multinationals to do the politics. Brian Eno on America. [thanks thad]

Free Manhattan School of Music faculty recital tonight.

Hugh Grant: puffy, queenie, likes to throw tanties.

Judge throws out obesity lawsuit against McDonald’s.

Flub-titles: When a film’s sub-titles don’t make perfect sense.

Headlines for Wednesday, January 22, 2003

New York’s currently: very cold, because we are weak

Germany follows France in opposition to war in Iraq.

Man arrested after cursing burnt McNuggets.

Maine pharmaceuticals-coercion plan, called Maine Rx, hits the Supreme Court today, supported by states, despised by drug companies.

Cat-cloners say cloning does not lead to duplication.

Oriana Fallaci rages against Islam, coolness, and Scorcese’s no-smoking policy.

Mainly-Western volunteers depart from London for Iraq, to act as human shields.

Dealing with years of death row issues may not bring victims’ families the closure they need.

Verizon ordered to divulge information of subscriber accused of sharing music on the Web from their personal computer.

I am your butcher; you shall have no other butcher besides me. Dario Cecchini, the Michelangelo of meat.

New dating fad includes eating and making out in the dark.

Tim Cavanaugh and the spirit of ‘73.

Devoted restaurant-eaters include many lawyers in Manhattan, willing to pay outrageous amounts for food.

Matt LeBlanc may lead a spin-off of Friends.

Information to correct your friends with: New York ranks the 11th most expensive city in the world.

Headlines for Tuesday, January 21, 2003

New York’s currently: 12th Nighting

France vows to block a resolution authorizing military action against Iraq, while U.S. deploys 37,000 troops to the Gulf.

Al Hirschfeld dies at 99, after a century of portraits.

Republicans relax rules so lawmakers can accept gifts and favors from lobbyists.

Virginia doctors still licensed after serious mistakes or cases of misconduct.

Show to see in New York: Architecture for Humanity, mobile health clinics to fight HIV/AIDS in Sub-Saharan Africa.

Fascinating amount of information on the murder of Emmett Till, the spark of the civil rights movement. Related: Frontline covers North Korea.

The perfect cartoons of Strindberg and Helium

Feeling a little out of touch with your community? Why not build a Gulch?

The history of gin’s slow fizz.

Man leads police on slow-speed chase.

Salon.com says it’s either subscribe or face a torrent of ads. We say subscribe!

A history of whaling, from a Melville point of view.

A few days later, like how it was with Ruthie and Josh, Mr. Delacourt’s brother the minister came in and married us, and afterward barbecue beef was catered, and we danced at our window while outside pink and purple balloons were released, and all the other kids were like, Rock on, you guys, have a nice baby and all! New fiction by George Saunders, ‘Jon.’

Headlines for Friday, January 17, 2003

New York’s currently: welcoming Sarah Hepola to snow-city

12 rockets equipped to carry chemical weapons found in Iraq. No-one quite sure what the discovery means, why the U.N. announced it, whether the rockets are listed in the 12,000-page document provided by Iraq, or what Dub-Dub is going to Dub-Do about it.

Bush on North Korea: ‘We Must Invade Iraq.’

NYPD avoids layoffs from City Hall.

Man arrested for impersonating cop to receive free caramel macchiato at Starbucks.

Study the words to sense ratio in Ari Fleischer’s archive of press briefings. [ thanks kf ]

Around the states, INS has significantly stepped up detention and deportation of foreign nationals from Muslim countries.

Scott Turow, a member of Ryan’s death penalty commission, weighs in with his concern for undermining faith in the law, sends memo to David E. Kelley.

Whalelane #5 now in stores.

Fluffertrax: Streaming music from pornographic films.

Photographs from the Chicago Daily News, 1902-1933. Related: Antidance Literature.

How David and Gregory Chudnovsky, New York number geniuses, learned to love patents, written by their patent lawyer.

Anti-war activists look to embrace middle America. (January 13-20: Week of protest.)

Some wonderful design: A Get Together To Tear It Apart.

Few Canadian students can identify 10 Canadian writers.

Woman scatters husband’s ashes at Rolling Stones concert.

Headlines for Thursday, January 16, 2003

New York’s currently: refusing certain temptations

Bush pressuring weapons inspector Blix to skip March 27 report on Iraq, focus instead on January 27 so U.S. can declare war shortly after. Related: If Blix’s report finds no weapons in Iraq, U.S. to rely on omissions as cause for war. Related: Rumsfeld’s speech explaining omission-policy.

Despite running a surplus from 1998 to 2001, Federal deficit will probably hit $300 billion next year, says White House aide, as country prepares for two wars while maintaining global anti-terrorism force, alienating reasonable allies, stoking a massive defense build-up, and celebrating another round of tax cuts while economy stays sour.

Man offers $100 for dirt on economist and Times columnist Paul Krugman. Glad to be paid for an easy job, Krugman responds. [ via cdl ]

Mad: 100 Updates Today in the Life of Dennis Mahoney.

1,500 patients leave the O.R. each year with surgical tools still inside them.

Dr. Pauley, also known as Dr. Dark, fights light pollution around New York.

Lucien Freud and David Hockney show results of traded portraits.

Despite his courageous opposition to the death penalty system, Governor Ryan’s legacy of corruption makes his departure sweet to Illinois-ians.

Map of cats who live in U.S. libraries.

Senator Frist: Perfect for good deeds. Bad for health care policy.

Hot News Day: 8,700 frying pans recalled because they may explode if used ‘on high heat, or used for frying.’

New Harry Potter novel to arrive on June 21.

German Satanists busy eating babies.

Fascinating stories at the FBI’s famous cases library. (favorite: Great telling of the Lindbergh kidnapping.)

Con man with 16 convictions obsessed with living like a cop.

Headlines for Wednesday, January 15, 2003

New York’s currently: growing the way things grow in fast movies

Bush to declare opposition to Michigan’s affirmative action policies, currently at stake in the Supreme Court.

New York experiencing a bank-robbery renaissance, say police.

John Le Carré: America has entered one of its periods of historical madness.

Users of a well-known Manhattan roommate-matching service receive Holocaust-revisionist messages.

Hollywood screenwriters need therapy after patrolling with the LAPD for ‘research’ and becoming targets, witnesses, and accident victims.

Is Ty single? Are the decorators actually talented? Devoted fans need to know: The truth behind the hit-home-decorating show Trading Spaces.

Restaurant week begins January 27. You are probably too late to make reservations.

The Whitney is no longer loaning its art to big donors, and now it wants its art back.

Straight from M.A.S.H.: Attention all military personnel, only the President can be called the Commander in Chief. That is all.

Best Link of 2003, So Far: With Our Voices Only: Beth and Chris sing ‘Easy Lover.’

Asking the bride’s father’s permission to marry still in vogue. Cattle-trading, not.

Robert Birnbaum interviews Sven Birkets.

Follow a progression of close-ups, starting 10 million light years away from Earth, and ending up somewhere in Florida.

Nicholson Baker prefers to type in the dark.

Top chef Bobby Flay doesn’t truss a chicken at home; he shapes it. Related: Q&A with wine critic Robert Parker Jr.

Headlines for Tuesday, January 14, 2003

New York’s currently: watching people move out of the city

Nine states and the District of Columbia building a joint non-profit to manage their prescription plans to avoid pressure from the drug makers.

Malawians attack senior politician, accusing him of harboring vampires.

Blair insists the U.N. has no veto power over war to disarm Saddam, confident weapons inspectors will find weapons in coming weeks.

Lieberman announces he’s going for President,

Banker who stole $70M from clients to build dream-castle in Tarrytown busted for embezzlement, ordered to drain the moat. Related: The castle’s Web site.

New York to resume recycling plastic this summer.

MTA considers dropping the token, raising the fare on subways and buses.

EBay used as research tool for scholars.

Video for every episode of The State, MTV’s brilliant mid-90s sketch comedy show.

A review of SUV ads where the writer feels better by pointing out that Arianna Huffington feels better by pointing out how terrible giant cars are for the U.S. Related: Background on SUVs and the current PR to sell big trucks to suckers.

Amanda Hesser on the struggle to move crisp fresh lettuce from the bag to the table.

Man shoves washing machine down the stairs, shoots it five times. [ via the os ]

Men’s fashion gets interesting with falsies.

For McQueen or San Francisco freaks: SF as seen in Bullitt, 1968. Then, Those same locations in 2002.

Headlines for Monday, January 13, 2003

New York’s currently: almost over its head-cold

U.S. looks for oil-fix from corrupt governments in West Africa.

Steve Case, co-founder of America Online, gives up his chairman title.

New York’s winter of 2002–3 may go down in the gloom-books as the dreariest ever.

Venezuela’s Chavez orders crackdown against six-week-old opposition strike. Related: Florida DJs convince Chavez he’s talking to Castro on-air.

Broken Assed Girl sought.

Beatles collectors busted for holding Let It Be tapes.

Bloomberg, writing checks as Anonymous, still giving large to New York, and believes reading is preferable to watching cable.

Pictures of New York, with captions, by Sam Brown.

Mass clemency in Chicago spurs death penalty debates around the country.

Love letter to New York public libraries.

Conversation is everything, it’s everything. It leads to all the other good things in life, a better sex life, better social life, better time with your children, better vacations. It’s fuel. The secret of a good marriage is to have lunch once a week. Interview with VF’s Graydon Carter.

Supreme Justice Scalia says courts have gone too far to keep religion out of schools and government.

New York vs. San Francisco: It’s all about the take-out, says Trillin.

Odd to learn Brooklyn’s largest swimming pool is right next to your jogging track.

Headlines for Friday, January 10, 2003

New York’s currently: a little late due to a birthday party

North Korea becomes first country to withdraw from Nuclear Nonproliferation Treaty, says it has no intention to produce nuclear weapons.

Illinois’s soon-to-be-missed Governor George Ryan to pardon four on death row, continuing to review all cases.

Canadian girlfriend unsubstantiated.

In Japan, the yonigeya will help you disappear, from your husband, debt, or affiliations with the mob.

The fact is that a gay man can be friends with a straight man. That can happen. Steve Guttenberg is back, directing his first film, PS Your Cat is Dead. (also, the film’s Web site.)

Most states have bleak economic futures; Find out how your state is faring fiscally.

Bush’s new accounting board vote themselves a salary of $452,000 in their first meeting ($52,000 more than the President), prepare to move into the old Arthur Andersen building.

Medical report: Hip-hugger pants cause tingly thighs.

Trendy garage rockers add vampire to line-up.

Eighth-century saint does not need to pay for cable.

The French Symbolists are a bit exquisite, but Rilke, in the grounding of his German, builds always from the heart, from an attachment to things. Interview with Stanley Plumly.

Day three of the riveting investigation into McWane Inc.

The advertising work of Dr. Seuss. [ via 37s ]

Headlines for Thursday, January 9, 2003

New York’s currently: gorgeous outside

This kind of news day: Ice falling off Empire State Building closes streets, diverts buses, kills no one at this time.

The Trent Lotte: separate but equal parts coffee and milk that you mix together.

British families grunt, having forgotten how to chat.

Music video involving library, flashing privates, moose, making out. [ thanks ltc ]

As Leslie Harpold once explained, New York is ruled by handymen.

Chelsea Whole Foods line-barker has the most gratifying job in the world.

Warren Beatty recalled posters for 1978’s Heaven Can Wait after noticing his crotch was too flat; added crease (6th item).

Post list of hidden, private, or secluded bars around Manhattan. Related: We will give out Milk & Honey’s reservation number for kidneys. [ via gwkr ]

In case you need to know: 15 most expensive hotel rooms in the world, including the Plaza’s $15,000/night Presidential Suite, with wine cellar.

We aren’t particularly politically aware; the paper is politcal satire by people who don’t really care all that much about politics. Interview with The Onion’s Editor-in-Chief Robert Siegel.

Harvey Williams’s letters as an ambulance driver during World War I.

365 days of MP3s.

Unpublished novelist honored to be included on Granta’s list of best novelists.

J.D. Lasica’s list of essential gear for the multimedia newsroom.

Some inanimate objects get humped; some end up molested.

Headlines for Wednesday, January 8, 2003

New York’s currently: scared of zealots; prepared to switch to Windows

Bloomberg plans massive school system overhaul, eliminating community school districts.

Saudi Arabia covertly trying to persuade Hussein to step down, to avoid war in the Gulf.

As the President’s largest donor over the course of his political career, Enron successfully lobbied the government at least 49 times; a list of their successes.

Long Bets: Gamble for big money on very distant outcomes.

New York is currently addicted to J. Lo, as one TMN editor in a frenzy can attest.

Behind the Bushes: Facts on the other Kennedys. Related: A study of the White House’s PR campaign to convince the country the only option is war.

Rolling Stones rent all 61 rooms of Montreal hotel.

Part II: New York sanitizes literature again for state tests, making sure Kafka, for one, seems brighter to high schoolers.

Video: LSD Tested on British Troops.

Landmark New York foodstuff Balducci’s closes 9th Street store.

Nazi panda ruins Canadians’ Christmas.

Your SUV supports terrorists, says commercial; so does your pot-smoking daughter.

Andrew Womack’s favorite recordings of 2002.

Good penmanship is no longer taught, but for some, still necessary. Reminds us, why don’t WASPs go to orgies? Too many thank-you notes.

Headlines for Tuesday, January 7, 2003

New York’s currently: predicting a week of falling potatoes

Democrats pitch economic plan, smaller and cheaper; reporters find just as many economists to trash it as they had yesterday for the GOP. Unfortunately, Dems still think sopping the rich is out of favor.

Ivory Coast rebel forces fight French troops, incidents called ‘serious’ but not a threat to upcoming peace talks.

Publishing millionaire finds second career in conducting, though only Mahler’s second symphony, more than 100 times.

Monkeys bred for laboratories retire to private chimp sanctuaries.

Extreme weather in Africa consistent with predictions for global warming.

Snow on television is usually potatoes.

Regular gym-goers fear the newbies: New Year resolution-ers who will cancel their membership in March.

Online personals, the new zipless fuck, and yes, everybody’s doing it.

Question: Why do all NPR hosts sound the same? Not related: Satan for President.

New York loses the Oscar Wilde Bookshop, the country’s oldest gay book store.

Excellent New York photography at Macrostate, particularly the 9/11 batch, and last year’s George Harrison memorial, with music from the sing-along. Related: New photos up at the Cross Atlantic Report.

Cracks appearing in North Korea’s side.

But led by a nondrinking, non-schmoozing commander in chief in the White House…The White House goes to bed early.

The Cinderella story of National Book Award winner Julia Glass. Also, because this seems startling, William Gibson has a blog.

Headlines for Monday, January 6, 2003

New York’s currently: very well-rested

Bush’s new budget plan, with keystone to eliminate taxes on corporate dividends paid to shareholders, aims to boost stock market, but is read as long-term damaging and barely helpful for now.

Two bombings in Tel Aviv kill 23, injuring over 100 in immigrant neighborhood.

David Sanger reports from the spoon: U.S. plan for governing Iraq after invasion unveiled, includes footnote: Can be managed easily alongside rebuilding Afghanistan, American economy, Presidential election.

Dear God, buy tickets now: Sam Mendes directs back-to-back productions at BAM of Twelfth Night and Uncle Vanya with cast including Russell Beale and Emily Watson.

Academic life seems a bit anxious, as defined by M.L.A. conference. Related: TMN roundtable on academia.

You can still win the Coudal Rock and Roll Quiz.

Best for the headline: Times Q&A: Is Prince Charles gloomy and depressed? Not related: New Year’s Eve gun shooting not supported in Chicago.

Pepys diary now published as blog format, beating, as we’d expect, all bloggers at the form.

Cheap classical music on Friday mornings at the Philharmonic.

Art is better, especially in the case of Degas, with dinosaurs.

The Smoking Gun’s gallery of mugshots, including celebrities.

Emo fashion turns Hawaii into Williamsburg; meanwhile, the mob makes Williamsburg look like New Jersey.

Itasca, Texas, gets all its news from teenagers.

Friend of TMN, Leila Segan, precious game show contestant. [ see nellybelly.mov ]

Darien, represent.