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The Morning News

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Currently: learning to use a computer again
Today’s Feature: “2008 Holiday Survival Guide for Slackers” by Matthew Baldwin
Latest in Digest: Annie Leibovitz at Work

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Death Row Diaries

I collect yearbooks because they are so much fun to draw from. Rows and rows of shiny faces and brief statements of accomplishment. Then I discovered the ultimate yearbook (though it’s hard to get the graduates to sign it): an annual publication that assembles the headshots of everyone who is mulling over their last meal order.

I was surprised by what I discovered in their stories. Instead of evil genius, I found stupidity, dreadful planning, and a childishness surrender to id and immediate gratification. While some of the condemned are brooding and long-term bad, most just lashed out in some asinine way that led straight to the gallows.

Should anyone be killed by the state? I think not. Can this level of poor judgment be reformed? I doubt it. What should be done with these folks? I dunno, so I drew them. Here’s the beginning of roll call for the current graduating class and a synopsis of their extracurriculars.

—Published October 19, 2004 » Email this » Save this » More TMN Galleries
Danny Gregory
TMN Contributing Illustrator Danny Gregory first learned to swim in the canal behind the Lahore American School, to kill ticks at Canberra Grammar School, to snap bras at the Kibbutz Givat Brenner, to light a match with one hand at Princeton University, and to mount sheep at the Northwestern School of Taxidermy. He is the author of several books and the obligatory blog and lives in Greenwich Village (with his first wife and son), where he does not attend NYU.

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TODAY’S FEATURE

2008 Holiday Survival Guide for Slackers

It’s a holiday tradition: You’re giftless mere hours until Christmas, and it’s printouts and January ETAs for the unlucky few on your list. MATTHEW BALDWIN has ideas for the eternally belated.

TOSSED

The Ghosts of Christmases Just Past

Geoff Badner photographs the trees that were.

NOW IN STORE

“Irritable Vowels”

The tee for exasperated spellers, designed by Jennifer Daniel. Available in women’s and men’s fits.

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DIGEST

Annie Leibovitz at Work

A new opus from the best-known American photographer inter-splices her images with her own observations and mild revelations from her splendid career.