Headlines from April 5, 2007

Nearly 1,600 tourists, most of them Americans, evacuated from a sinking cruise ship in the Aegean.
With the exception of drunk men overboard, cruise ships are generally considered safe.
With Congress out of session and unable to object, a major "Swift Boat" backer is appointed ambassador to Belgium.
Census data show that without immigration, America's largest cities would shrink--New York alone would be down 600,000 residents
After eight years of drought, western states have started looking for long-term water solutions.
Australia is already one step ahead with Water Restriction Community Officers and lawns that thrive on saltwater.
Four thousand Manchester United fans follow their team to Rome; 3,982 make it home without being hospitalized.
"The Divine also told me to transmit soul acupuncture. He told me, I will download a soul acupuncture needle. Silent DownLOAAAD!!" Dr. Sha brings faith healing into the internet age.
Presence of a faint vanilla aroma means Joan of Arc is most likely a mummy.
The hunt is on for a new Bob Barker, but when Mario Lopez tells us to spay or neuter our pets, will he really mean it?
After a gruesome Tokyo murder, commentators wonder whether Japan is really as safe as we fear.
How to become America's Most Wanted; how to safely sell diamonds door-to-door.
"I know. Hieroglyphics self-taught are a chore, Robin; but, it is a surefire way to unravel the secrets of the ancient mystics." Batman lectures Robin.
Peas, please, but better frozen than fresh.
Bush takes the Supreme Court's ruling on greenhouse emissions seriously--but says it's bad for business.
The 15 freed British sailors land at Heathrow.
Dressed in ill-fitting clothes apparently issued by their captors, the Britons waited in line to meet the president, looking almost as if they were a visiting sports team.
Iran asks U.S. if its envoys can visit Iranians captured in January Iraq raid.
Gonzales preps for next week's Congressional testimony with practice runs and phone calls to GOP lawmakers.
Frightening stats on current New York HIV infection rates prompt the Dept. of Health to begin a circumcision campaign.
Ugandan government overturns unequal adultery law--extramarital affairs are now legal.
In Virginia, Miami, and Baltimore, three South American military officers were arrested on suspicion of committing war crimes in the '70s and '80s.
Judge says elementary school principal who threw feces at student has "already suffered enough."
Red meat is an equal-opportunity offender.
Honeybees pollinate every third bite of food ingested by Americans--so there's cause for alarm when they start disappearing.
Mexican hummingbirds have moved full-time to Texas, and other signs of climatic change.
Former political opponents say Obama's nice guy image belies the fact that the man plays hardball.
School mistakenly charges student who called school hotline an hour before a bomb threat--they hadn't changed their clocks for Daylight Savings Time.
The Brooklyn chef who catches dinner with a home-rigged trap in Ft. Greene.